My Journey to Finding and Living Hope

Salvi Cammarata

Author: Salvi Cammarata

I have the privilege of facilitating suicide prevention training on behalf of Living Hope. This is very near and dear to my heart as I have lived in Edmonton my entire life. I also have a lived experience of managing bipolar disorder, two suicide attempts, many years of suicide ideation and self-stigmatization. I like to think of it more as a living experience.

My diagnosis came sometime after a major depressive episode and my first attempt. I was hospitalized for almost six weeks which included many electroconvulsive therapy treatments. My life obviously suffered shocks, both literally and figuratively. After my second attempt I was hospitalized again, went through five years of weekly group psychotherapy as an outpatient and frequent calibration of antipsychotic medications. During this time, I lost my marriage, a relationship with both my children, many friends, my career, my home, and my identity.

Now after more than 22 years of soul searching and nearly ten years without an episode of mood cycling, I find myself an advocate for mental health, men’s health, and for suicide attempt survivors. 

Today, I am blessed with having a very loving and supportive family who have encouraged me to reconnect with my children.

I am currently involved with the Community Mental Health Action Plan (CMHAP) and the Peer Working Group through the e4c Wellness Network, all while working for the Imagine Institute for Learning.

During the last four years I have been fortunate enough to provide QPR Suicide Prevention training and share my story in my attempt to give back to the community. I find this to be very cathartic as I continue with my journey. I cannot say that I am cured in any way or that I am certain I will never attempt again but I can say that I am presently thriving and, in my own personal way, demonstrating a living hope.